"If you don't love yourself, you cannot love others. You will not be able to love others. If you have no compassion for yourself then you are not able of developing compassion for others.” - Dalai Lama
“Trust yourself. Think for yourself. Act for yourself. Speak for yourself. Be yourself. Imitation is suicide.” - Marva Collins
“Love yourself unconditionally, just as you love those closest to you despite their faults.” - Les Brown
Do you love yourself!?! Hmm..what a question. Answer is, I'm still learning to, after many scrapes, bangs and falls. Growing up, my answer would have been a straight no. The ridicules of life threw me in the black hole of self doubt and low self-esteem. People who were meant to be by my side only proved to be monsters of their own making. I developed this sense of trying to create or pretend this perfect world around me, only to know everything was falling apart on the inside. I've lived through abuse of all kinds, saw the sun come out, only for it to be taken away again. I've gathered strength from places I didn't know existed & fought back to live on and other times fallen waiting for a helping hand to come and help me up again.
When I started this blog, I didn't have a clue what I would talk about, it was just something to throw down what I was feeling. After spending time browsing other blogs, I'm surprised at how many of them are full of 'Look this way, dress like this' I mean really!?! I don't mind the sweet ones that show the cute things they've bought, I myself am a clothes fanatic and love dressing up, it makes me feel great. But, what about the inside?? I want to know how these clothes and what not make the person feel, some of their pictures you can just see how it makes them feel, but others are clearly trying to advertise how (not) cool they are. Where are the pictures of smart women and ideas of not being known just for what we look like on the outside, but be measured on how we come across as a person on the inside?? Our thoughts, feelings, beliefs!?!
I am a woman, I love clothes - just check my wardrobe, lol. I love getting all dolled up and expressing myself artistically through my clothes, but it isn't my whole life, it isn't my personality, it doesn't make up who I am. Haven't we been fed enough bull about how we should be by the media, only to now be doing almost the same things ourselves!?! I'm all for the blogs/people who love fashion & maybe want to be designers and use their blog for these purposes, and I can tell the difference between these people. I don't need to be a scientist for that. Thousands of 'followers' only to be fed watered-down rubbish of what someone thinks I should be wearing! I don't think so. There are people out there that have no self-esteem, who only end up feeling worse because they don't fit into this pre-designed cut out of what society thinks they should look like! And I am fed up!
If you don't love yourself, who else is going to?? And how do you know when the person is showing you love or the right kind of love, if you don't even express love to yourself!! I'd like to start a revolution of women & girls who decide enough is enough and stop worrying about their weight, how they look (meaning comparing themselves to other women) dress the way that makes THEM feel great and love the bodies their in and tell society to shove it where the sun doesn't shine!! Little girls all over are looking up to the pictures they see in the magazines, on the TV and all around, don't they deserve better role models!?! Teach them they can be doctors, lawyers, sports players, politicians, anything they desire because they deserve that right. Why do we not see that we're worth more than all the gold in the world!?! We were created individually not together, otherwise we'd all look the same!! Why not celebrate our differences & uniqueness instead of trying to fit in the box that frankly no one fits into!?!
No one should ever feel like their less than perfect, it breaks my heart to see young girls still trying to fit in and doing everything possible to do that, because I was that girl at one point and I tell you, it gets you no where, but broken. Growing up being of mixed race was even a struggle, I wanted to be void of any colour, but now I celebrate it. I didn't fit in anywhere, even though I had loads of friends. I didn't even feel I felt in at home, too many problems there. Why aren't we teaching self-esteem instead of other things!?! Love the fact that you are one of a kind, no one else on this earth will ever be you, laugh like you, be a good friend like you, achieve their dreams like you. You are perfect in your making, the only time you aren't is when you waste your time trying to be someone else! Screw the world, you only live once, dress up, love, laugh, explore the world, catch your dreams, do and live as YOU set out to live, never let anyone take that away from you....after all the horror I've been through that would be my advice to someone young, Love yourself - faults and all, because there will never be another you & you were created for a purpose. Change the world for the better - lend a hand to someone in need, because you never know when you'll need one extended back!! And importantly never feel like your less than perfect or your nothing..because you are everything to the world, each one of us who choose to fight on the side of love & good are the ones who make the world a better place for ourselves & others!! Remember, you are loved...just be who you are!!!
Pink - Perfect!
(one of my inspirations, feel like I could of wrote her music)